How to know when you are ready to try pole dance

I hear a lot from women who are afraid to try pole because they “have absolutely no upper body strength” or they “are too fat to prance around in my underwear” or because they have “no fitness experience whatsoever.”

First, pole dance is not prancing around in your underwear. That is insulting.

The deeper issue is the feeling of being too inadequate to pole dance. This feeling of inadequacy is especially important because these are often the women (and men!) who have the same qualms about trying Zumba or weightlifting or swimming or running. People who feel inadequate don’t want to feel foolish trying something new, and they often don’t think that their bodies look good enough or are capable enough of mastering a new sport.

Truthfully, pole dance is not for everyone. So how do you know if you should try it?

Basically, it works like this: you should try pole dance if you are interested in it. If you are not interested in pole, then you should try another sport. You should not, under any circumstances, continue to do nothing.

You should ignore the fact that you won’t be good at pole or whatever other sport you choose, probably for a very long time. In fact, you will probably be very, very bad at it. You should try anyways, because trying and failing and continuing to try is part of life. These lessons will help you in every other aspect of your life.

You should ignore the fact that you might not be strong enough or flexible enough for pole or whatever sport you choose. You will not become stronger or more flexible until you try consistently, frequently, and with all your heart and brain behind the effort. Have faith that with practice, you will become strong enough. Have faith that you are enough.

You should ignore the fact that you might not look good while you are trying pole or whatever sport you choose, because life isn’t about looking good. Life is about building yourself into the best person you can be, and part of being the best person you can be is maintaining your health and fitness. Life is about helping others, and you can’t help others if you are not confident in your own abilities. Training, for pole or for any other sport, will give you confidence and the ability to help others. Training is not about what you look like. If you wait for your appearance to change, you are wasting your time and your life, which is shorter than you think. Don’t waste time.

You should ignore the fact that other people might not like your new hobby. Change is scary, and the people in your life might not approve of pole dance or whatever sport you choose. These people may like the old you. They may see your new endeavors as a threat to them. You should find people who are supportive of changes that make your life better. When you get better people in your life, you will be able to do great things. It takes courage to ignore negative people. Be courageous.

You should ignore the fact that people might look at you. In most studios, gyms and sporting arenas, other people are supportive of your efforts. If someone is looking at you funny, you should ask them for advice. Make a friend, and  learn more about pole or whatever sport you chose. Stop focusing on how you feel and start focusing on how to make yourself better.

You should ignore the fact that you are afraid, because only by facing your fears will you move forward. Fear is a natural part of life. As you overcome fear, you will become better able to handle challenges, both on and off the pole. You will walk taller. You will demand more out of your life. People will respect you. Face your fears.

How do you know when you are ready to try pole dance? You won’t. Jump in, try something new, and make your life better, starting now. Stop waiting for the perfect moment, and start where you are. Be courageous, and do it immediately.

Leave a comment


  1. I found this really interesting. A lot of it can also apply to ballet. If I knew of a pole dancing class nearby, I’d be tempted to try it if it wouldn’t be too weird for a guy to do it.

    • Yes! It can apply to any sport- that is the point. So many people don’t do anything because they are afraid, and then they remain unhappy because they have no athletic outlet. As far as taking pole, every studio has different policy. I actually wrote a post about men in pole dance, which is here, if you are interested. Thanks for reading!

  2. Hi Kim!

    Great post! I was just thinking about writing a similar topic this morning with regards to pole dancing and everything else in life because I read this article:! And then I opened up WordPress and saw your article! 🙂 Just thought I’d share the article with you too.

    By the way I just started a pole blog as well. Would appreciate if you could link me!!

    Keep poling! 🙂


  3. Thank you so much for this post! Totally what I needed to hear right now. You rock!

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